Drop kick a kid

Is it ok to not care for a parent based on how the child behaves towards my own. There is a child in Leif's daycare, we will call him Butthead for conversations sake, who is down right rude and mean. Leif really wanted to go to a friends birthday party a few weeks back. In fact it was his first birthday party of his friends that he really made a stink about so we decided to take him. Butthead was there and when his mom asked him if he and Leif were friends the kid said; "sometimes yes and sometimes no."

This is where my question is: In my opinion I think this type of behavior at this age is a direct demonstration of one of the parents if not both. Is it a result of the parents behavior? Whether it was deliberately taught or not I think this would be a direct result. Ok play the devil's advocate and let's just pretend that he has no dad. Call me cold but I think the mom needs to step forward and play the dad too. I would never allow my child to walk all over me and be disrespectful to others even as a single mom. Maybe I just don't understand how tough it is but I have seen single moms raise their children, specifically boys, but no excuses for mom regardless of her background to not step forward and be there for her children and provide some sort of stability.

 If I EVER heard Leif say that I would almost immediately if not later at the first opportune moment pull him aside and discuss the fact that he was completely rude and even though it's good to be honest you must use your judgement in what you say to people. In this case, the mom just laughed.

Before I even knew what kid this lady belonged to, she would walk by me and I'd just get this feeling of fakeness. I feel awful for being judgmental but it's one of those things you can't escape. When I found out what kid belonged to her I didn't care for her even more. When I found out that her kid, is a bully and makes my kid cry, I wanted to drop kick this kid and give the mom the bird next time she smiles at me.

How much of a child's behavior towards other people a direct reflection of ones atmosphere growing up? How they were taught to love and respect those around them...if at all. I'll be talking to the director of the daycare tomorrow.

Here's what happened: Leif had an AWESOME day today. Got a sticker for being good at school, listened all evening, ate his dinner, and even washed his hair by himself for the very first time. After we read our bedtime stories I tucked him in gave him a hug and kiss and said goodnight. As I went to shut the door he stuck his tongue out at me and blew a raspberry. When I immediately opened the door to ask him why he did that he had a melt down. Said he didn't want to get into trouble and that it was just a sneeze. I reminded him that he would get in more trouble if he lied to me versus telling me the truth. That's when the waterworks came. He broke down and said he didn't want to get in trouble and that Butthead did it to him at school and called him names. I immediately came to his side and hugged him telling him that he is a smart, kind, and sweet little man. Told him to tell the teacher if this Butthead is mean to him anymore and to remember how it feels when someone is mean to him before he is mean to someone else. I wanted nothing more to unleash mama bear on this kid and give a tongue lashing to the mom at that very moment. My favorite pal crying because some kid is a bully. Now I realize is when I need to equip him with the emotional tools and intelligence to defeat bullies in the most appropriate of manners. Just gotta figure out what those are.

This just made me laugh so I decided to use it.

True Blood Season Finale--SPOILERS

Firstly I just want to state that the season finale of True Blood I think could have totally been 2 hours long. So many ways it could have gone. I mean...I'd love to have seen more Eric Northman!

Secondly...the ending was totally rushed. I mean come on!! Sookie ends up with some guy who looks like Wolverine from the side?!

Thirdly, I completely forgot the whole vampire explodes when they die thing so when Vampire Bill and Sookie staked him together, super vampirey sweet btw, I definitely did a 'HOLY COW' moment when it happened.

I'll miss the series even though I have only actively been following the series for the last two seasons. I like the series and recommend it to anyone who likes scifi, vampires that don't sparkle but are sexy, and fairies!

That's all I'm gonna say on this matter since I'm still upset the ending felt rushed. And still pissed Vampire Bill did die and Sookie didn't have magical healing powers to cure Vampire Bill and live happily ever after.

Anybody for a spin off? "New Blood?"

The Amount of Bullshit...

I'm tired of people thinking they can manipulate me. I'm tired of being played like a puppet. Sure I like to make people happy but that's no reason to take advantage of that fact. And just so you know....I have a side that doesn't come back from the dark side. A side that once you've crossed that line, you will never know reparation.

My hope in the human race sometimes gets in the way of seeing the true nature of people and who they say they are and how they act. I'm blinded by the hope that people will choose to be good and not bad. Will choose to do good and not bad. I may never learn this lesson and probably continue to get burned through my adult life. I can't stop this in me though. It's who I am and it's what makes me happy.

To those who take advantage of that...be good to me and I'll be good to you. Manipulate me and I will find out because I am NOT dumb and NOT unintelligible in the ways of reading people. You may be good at hiding it for now. But the truth will come out and the truth will set me free. And then...you will have crossed that line.

Forgiveness? Sure...if you show that you truly want it. If you don't care...don't waste my time. I'll forgive you without knowing because I won't allow that to eat me up. You will have burned that bridge to me and I believe in my heart of hearts, that our hearts would have grown and benefited from us being friends.

So long to those of you who think you can walk all over me for I will shake you off me in due time.

This is gonna be deep.

This post will be a bit heavy. But I feel like I have to say something because it's buggin me deep down inside and I feel like the only way I'll be able to move forward is if I write about it.

I dated this guy for about three years after a few years on my own from my ex-husband. Things were so amazing with this guy. He was perfect...so I thought. The first two years were great without any fallouts, arguments, or discourse to really speak of. It almost seemed too perfect to be true. 

I came from a background of not knowing anything illegal. Drugs....thought they were bad, didn't do them and wasn't interested in them at all. Won't deny that I didn't try some when I met this guy. It wasn't anything super crazy but the worst drug I probably tried with him was cocaine. After the first time I decided that I didn't like how it made my nose bleed and I didn't like the fact that I couldn't feel my teeth. Alcohol I stayed away from until I was about 20. And pretty much followed the rules (still do even now) in everything I did. Call me a prude but it suited me well at that time in my life but that's another story for another day.

So I how was I suppose to know that he did drugs? I didn't know what I was even looking for and I was too involved with my work and being happy with someone who was jumping through hoops to make me happy. Something my ex-husband had denied me for three years and maybe really I had possibly denied myself for awhile too. Drugs....? What are those?

I stayed friends with his mom from the beginning. Our meeting each other was less than perfect but I think it opened us up to each other on a whole "well, we did just go through this with each other on the first day" type of thing so why not be familiar. But we've developed a friendship and love toward each other that I think is probably the closest friendship I will ever have in my adult life.

Her son passed away in 2009 of a drug overdose. I saw him the day before they pulled the plug. The way he went is not a dignified way to go. I was so angry toward him for all the pain he had caused my family, his family, and myself that I still don't remember shedding a tear for him. Until recently. His mom came to town for some personal business and we had a short visit where we shed some tears and embraced each other. It was beautiful and made me realize how much I miss my friend. Until she said one word.

We we're talking about him and discussing everything that had happened. I had been separated from him for awhile before he passed so some of the events that happened leading up to his death are a mystery to me. I learned that I had been dating a heroin addict for the majority of my relationship with him. He was clean only for a short period of time in the beginning of our meeting. NOT our relationship....the beginning of our meeting which started way before we dated.

HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SO BLIND!!! I felt my heart sink when she said that to me. I feel even angrier now. Betrayed more than ever. Hateful in some ways and less likely to forgive in others. I'm lost in what to do with this black hole inside me that has nothing but contempt for a person I don't ever want to shed a tear for. I tried to grieve and move on with the one person who I thought was appropriate with and that turned into a big 'Hi! Hello...just an FYI---he did fuckin' heroin.'

Am I making too much out of it? I don't think I am because it was all intravenously. Ya.....

How do you get past that one?

Might as well have been inside an egg the whole time...

The Roaches Have a Vendetta Against Me!

No one can change my mind about this. The cockroaches and Palmetto bugs are after me!

Living in Florida has it's ups and downs. It's biggest down is the massive Palmetto bugs, which let's face it they are really just giant cockroaches. These things get to be the size of your hand, people! And if you thought killing the small ones were tough...you should try your luck on these suckers. Even a can of raid isn't going to take these guys out. And I'm not sure if this is a rumor or not but I heard they can survive without their heads for an extended period of time. Nothing like that chicken that lived for 18 months but still...one minute without a head is one minute too long for me.

And even that doesn't kill the biggest of roaches sometimes! 

These creepy, slinky, quick moving pests started their vendetta against me during hurricane Charlie. It was so terribly hot due to the power being out I thought it'd be a grand idea to move a mattress downstairs and just sleep in the livingroom. For those of you who don't know, RAIN BRINGS BUGS IN.

This....is NOT ok with me.

My cat Edward, is a master hunter. Especially in his younger days there was nothing that could be present in my house without him being aware of it. If it lived it was because Edward chose to let it live. During the roar of the steadily increasing winds and scattered lightning strikes I felt Edward step onto the mattress. When I felt him pounce on me I knew something was not okay. I turned on the lantern only to see that there was not only a roach on me but they were all over my mattress, living room floor and walls. They scattered as soon as the light turned on and of course Edward was in bug heaven chasing after all of them as I panicked and screamed standing up and shaking out my hair and going into full blown panic mode.

This is what I imagine them doing in my house when I'm not around. Germing up the place!

Since then anytime they appear in my house, not only do they barrel towards me but they strategically place themselves so that I will always see them. I found one about three inches long just hanging out in one of my kitchen drawers and slammed the drawer shut immediately to hopefully trap it (ya right! How'd it get in there in the first place) and wait for my husband to kill it. 20 minutes later I went to make sure it wasn't scurrying around in the kitchen and saw my son's BMW M3 Coupe right below the drawer I found that damned roach in. My son wasn't even home so I know it wasn't him that left it there!

I swear that roach was driving that thing around. They think it's like Joe's Motel up in here.

They've put themselves in my cat's bag of food so when I come down in the morning all dreary eyed and reach into the bag to scoop out some food...there he is sitting right on top of the scooped food. Of course I screamed and cat food went flying everywhere.

May be the one that was driving the car around. Not sure.

And then last night, I knew my cat Abbi had found something under the couch by the way she was behaving. I only hoped that it was an Anoli. I would not be so lucky. Before I knew it Abbi had coaxed that disgusting vial creature out from under the coach and it was now running straight towards me. Cornered I had no where to go but up and found myself standing on my chair ready to jump on my desk and climb up my bookshelf to get away from this thing. My husband, as usual, comes to dispose of this thing and pops it with his shoe supposedly killing it. He comes back with a tissue to pick it up...looks at it and says "I think it might still be alive" and tosses it outside. (Sometimes his need to keep his karma in check is not ok with me) Just like I said it would that toxic creeper was back in my house, waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs the very next morning...gimping around.

I develope Spidey Senses when I see a cockroach

Experts say it's one of the cleanest animals around. I'm sorry but anything that can survive a nuclear holocaust has something seriously wrong with it and is NOT ok in my books. The torture continues...at least until I move somewhere ultra cold where they don't like to exist.

Stupid Baer Grylls...why you gotta go and eat those nasty things!

DEATH TO ALL COCKROACHES!

Arranged Marriages in Today's World

I stumbled on this show about a month or so ago via web surfing calling 'Married at First Sight.' I read the description and watched the trailer and was instantly intrigued at the idea of this short series.

It's a social experiment were a psychologist, sexologist, and a spiritual-ologist (don't think that's a word but they totally used it in this series) all got together and interviewed a butt load of people who were interested in the concept of marrying a complete stranger for reasons ranging from they don't have time to date, haven't had much luck in the dating world, or are just tired of looking/waiting for the right person to come around. I don't remember the exact number of people who auditioned for this experiment but I remember thinking that it was a lot. 

They settled down two three sets of couples and put them through some very draining and long tests to make sure that they were paired up to the best person imaginable through science. YA SCIENCE! 

On their wedding day all three couples had not seen their future spouse, knew their name, or anything about who they were marrying. This is the part that gets me...I've always had a huge fascination with the Elizabethan era and of course they had arranged marriages back then. The only difference between back then and this experiment is that the couples had paintings of what they other looked like (or rumors) and heard rumors of who they were with the occasional meeting before the big day. I've always wondered how they managed. What feelings they were experiencing and if any of them genuinely tried. I figured they had to as I've read some of the marriages were very successful. 

One couple was a complete disaster. The bride cried and I was almost certain she was going to say 'No' at the alter. After the ceremony she went and sat in a corner and balled her superficial eyes out about how he wasn't attractive to her and that she had made a mistake. Her now husband, was amazing. He was so respectful of her boundaries and never once tried to rush things and make her feel uncomfortable in any of it. He tried to liven up the mood with humor and the honey he was nothing but sweet and totally willing to play by her rules. A few weeks pass and she sees his personality and the family she has just been married into and of course she starts to fall in love. Thank goodness for that otherwise I would have hated her because he is SO super sweet.

All three couples have 4 weeks to decide whether or not they are going to stay married or get a divorce. I'm excited to see what happens and really hope that all three couples stay together. Realistically I think only two will make it. But it's an interesting experiment and can't deny that I would totally be down for an arranged scientific marriage.

If you are interested in checking it out you can watch it online on the FYI Network. You may consider this a chick show but my husband has totally gotten into this experiment too. It's worth a look.

The non-superficial selfie challenge

I started this community on Facebook called Selfie-A-Day. I've discovered since I've started this that there are a lot of people out there who believe selfies are narcissistic and self absorbed. Especially from those who all they do is post selfies of themselves.

Whoa what's with the crazy eye color?

I'm here to tell you now that I started this to follow through on a challenge I received from my sister in law I believe almost a year ago. To take a photo of something everyday. I basically told her I didn't think I'd be able to do it. Mostly because I don't really think I'd follow through to the end if it's something that involves long term forced daily use of my cell phone. I already don't like talking on my cell phone and even though texting is much more convenient and am more like to answer you via text, I still don't care for it. Send me a postcard or a letter. I'll send one back!

that's right...I threw in a winky face.

I'd like to think that it's taken me a year to figure out what I would take a photo of everyday but I'd be being extremely facetious. And that only works in person. Procrastination is typically ended by inspiration.

Inspiration face. Hand gesture added for extra umph! 

I've considered her challenge more than once but I decided on Selfie-A-Day after watching a video on a condition called Trichotillomania. The woman who made the video had suffered from this from a very young age. I believe I had a cousin who also suffered from this for a short period of time in her life. She documented her struggles with the disease daily for 16 years and then compiled all the photos together in a video with your typical smoozy music. But it was beautiful and interesting. I never watched the video as to why she decided to document her struggles but I have my speculations.

Speculations are universal in everyone usually speculates the same thing.

While I have nothing that affects me on a daily basis except for the daily mess in my house from kids, I found myself being willing to do something similar to see if I could produce the diversity of photos with the mass of emotions displayed on a daily basis. To be real and try and display any emotion that has been the majority of my day on pixelated photos. I take photos of random things all the time on a daily basis...and if I think hard probably post them on some sort of social media networking site on an almost daily basis too. So the taking one every day is no big deal. But selfies are something I usually save for profile pictures or a sneaky way to take pictures of little busy bodies (A good way to get a clear shot of your 4 year old or 17 month is to give them a hug). And are also something that I find a bit cliché at times.

HOLLA!!

So here I am 30 days into my Selfie-A-Day challenge and am feeling pretty generic about the duration of the challenge. I am determined to make it to 365, the reason for the determination is yet to be found. So far I figure it's because the gamer inside me can't run from a challenge. I may take a hot minute...or year to get there but I'll get there and then it's game on!

Games time!